Sunday, 9 November 2014

Back to work we go

Wow what a week!

Started a temping job on Monday, in a small Law Firm and it was great!

The routine the structure I welcome it. 

Back to early rises, commuting on the train and packed lunches. Glad to say I haven't lost my typing speeds, good thing I was keeping my hand by blogging!

Now to get organised at the weekends.

I have been pretty strict about getting sarnies / lunch boxes prepared the night before so that we can relax somewhat in the morning and eat breakie and so far so good.

Will take Toffie out later today down to the beach with the gang for a good walk and then relax.

Oh need to prep some baby balls and pack some brooches for posting!

Hope you are all keeping well?

x Fi

Saturday, 1 November 2014

Happy Hallowe'en!

Hi guys!

Sorry it's been a couple of weeks.

Haven't been hugely productive patchworkwise but man is my house organised!

Made a baby ball for a little girl in Poland.


I made a huge decision and that was to dismantle my craft room.  The boys now have a room each of their own.  With the children's help I brought all my patchwork stuff downstairs and rejigged my shelving unit so that one corner of it is all my craft books and boxes of goodies and my storage room in the sitting room (under the stairs) has all my sewing paraphernalia in it too.  I'm totally happy with this decision.  The boys are over the moon as they have their own space.

I have to say doing these monumental chores (there was more - I moved a piece of furnitutre into my kitchen and it's so much cosier in there believe it or not) kept me busy because I was going through a phase of not sleeping as my body was twitching every time I was about to drop off.  Horrendous nights and I wouldn't wish insomnia on anyone.

But good news I had my Neurology appointment on Wednesday and the Professor isn't one bit worried that there is anything untoward.  He believes it is down to stress and anxiety.  Since his words I have looked at the positive and feel great.  I also started taking Vitamin B tablets and of course my tabs that the doc prescribed.

Other news, I'm starting a temping job on Monday so I'm looking forward to getting out and into a routine.

I realise that this time to set up and run my own business was an eye opener for me.  I will still continue running the business (just need a bit more time) but I am better at the moment getting up and out and getting some work done with a regular wage and let my creative side out in my spare time.  But I won't be making the mistake of taking up every spare minute sewing.

I realise now the value of spending time on yourself.  There were times up till Wednesday that I honestly thought I was losing my mind.  I've had some great supportive friends and a superb hubby and two boys and appreciate their patience but the mind as I have learnt is so so powerful that it can make your body literally start shutting down it's unbelievable.  Not one of my friends ever said to me "snap out of it" thank goodness because you can't, you just can't snap out of it. 

It's a weird feeling, your mind is empty, in the pit of your stomach there is a lonely forlorn feeling but I don't know if I'm explaining it right even with that.  The thoughts of getting through the day were awful.  So all I can say is first of all get yourself down to your GP and tell them how you feel.

If you aren't happy with their response get a second opinion particularly if you know you are not yourself.  Another thing even if you don't feel like it make sure you get out for a walk with a friend, it's the social aspect that helps you forget about yourself for a while and that's what you need to do.  Too much time on your hands to think about yourself is not ideal guys!

Any way it's a sunny day today, I'm waiting for a mate to come over and collect her kiddie (sleepover) and then I'll take Toffie and the boys out for a walk in my favourite park!

Feast your eyes on this near take-off by Toffie a week ago, a wonderful pup!



http://www.mentalhealthireland.ie/

 

Saturday, 11 October 2014

I've given up on putting post titles on my posts, I'm rubbish at coming up with clever headlines :(

Had a hectic week.  Hubby is visiting his mum in Athens this week.  He says the weather is just glorious.  I have to say it's been ok here in Dublin, cold but once the sun breaks through....

Had a prang with the car a couple of weeks ago.  I was manouevering into a car space and I DIDN'T SEE the height restriction bar, in my defence it is painted grey and comes out beyond the stone wall gate that you enter into the car park by.

When I mentioned it to a school mum, she informed me she had done the very same thing a couple of years ago and she saw another driver go into it last winter.  When I inspected the bar after it mangled the passenger door and rear door, I saw it was FULL of scuff marks so it's a regular problem that column, it would help if it was painted yellow and not the colour of the Irish sky which is generally grey.

Anyhow, I got it repaired during the week and oh my it's lovely driving without that embarrassing crunch on the side of the car.  Son #2 and I cleaned the car today, it was funny because about 3 of my neighbours had the same idea!

Son #1 was out at a Scout Hike, fun was had by all which is the most important thing!

I felt like doing some needlework today so in between all of the stuff I did today which included walking son #2 and Toffie for over an hour then off for lunch then car cleaning which son was planning on doing himself  but I finished, I don't think I sat down for long today.

But I did manage to make some fabric flower brooches in between all of this.


Well I will leave you now, Strictly is on tonight, I know it's not all of your cups of tea, but I love it!

Have a good Saturday girls!

Fi
 

Tuesday, 7 October 2014

Strictly

Any one else watching Strictly Come Dancing this year?

I have to say it's one of my favourite "reality" shows, that and Celebrity Get Me Out of Here!  I must say the standard is very high this year, that chap from Eastenders is some dancer!


I took up my Granny Squares on Saturday night and got crocheting.  I have about 40 grannies done, but still need a load more to make it a worthwhile sized blanket.  At the moment it would barely cover my six year old.  The beauty of this is though that I can take it up whenever the mood takes me, I have to be careful because I feel it in my arms the next day if I overdo it.


 

Friday, 3 October 2014

Thank you and say hello to Toffee

Thank you guys for all your emails and I have replied to as many as I can at the moment.  Is it ok to say it's nice to hear that one is not alone when the mind is a bit dark?  It's not nice to go through this experience, but what is comforting is that there are others out there who have been there and understand what is happening.

I have to say, whether it's the medication and/or my decision to step away from PD from a little while that I have had three good days!  And I will continue with that attitude.

Malahide Castle
Those of you who follow my IG account will know this already but for those of you who are reading, you may not know but we got a puppy back in March.  She's a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel and she's gorgeous!

Say hello to Toffee, yep that's the spelling we went with it was an error on hubby's part, but he's Greek and was spelling it phonetically and we stuck with it 'cause it's great!

Toffee earlier this week

She's just over 8 months now and such a loving puppy!  She's like my third child, she follows me everywhere. 

We had our first bad weather today, strong winds and heavy rain.  I had plans to take her on a good long walk, but the weather scuppered that or so I thought.  We did a smaller walk but she wasn't too phased with the rain.  She dried herself on the passenger seat, shh don't tell hubby.  

Toffee I'd say 12 weeks old
As I am typing this post, she is curled up on my lap, for company and for heat.  She's resting her mouth in the crook of my arm, good thing I'm a touch typist cause it doesn't interfere with my typing.

Have to break the connection now though, because I am meeting some fellow Scout leaders for Friday coffee, they have been a lifesaver getting my out on Friday am, I enjoyed it but at the same time didn't not the girls fault at all, it was purely because of how unwell I felt but they helped me get out for a few hours.  Today I plan on totally enjoying the banter and company and muffins!

Keep well my friends!

xx
 

Wednesday, 1 October 2014

Taking a breather

So I made a decision yesterday and that was to close Patchworkdelights for a while.

I have been feeling very unwell for the last year, during the summer it was all good and then in the last couple of months things got very dark. 

My body was trembling, I had trouble sleeping, I was in a dark mood with crying on nearly a daily basis.  Then this week as soon as I woke I would feel a hot burning tingling sensation creep up from my toes to the roots of my hair and I thought to myself, here we go again.  Monday just gone was basically spent in bed.  People who know me know that I am not a bed person, I'm up when I'm awake and that's that.  The doc told me to make sure I get out for a walk.  This is easier said than done.  I literally couldn't get out of bed, never mind go for a walk.  And that's not being smart, my mind wasn't letting me!

Hubby was off yesterday and when I came back from the school run I just burst in to tears (again).  I'd had enough of this mood.  Last week my doc put me on medication for extreme anxiety.  As I lay in bed yesterday morning (again) thinking I can't have another day like this, I thought to myself, what is causing me to stress.  Well the fact that PD will be running on its own in six weeks and I can't make a proper living on this business was the nub of it.  A wake up call, shut the shop down for the moment and rethink everything. 

I will be starting back at work temping in November.  Even though sometimes you get tired of different characters in the workplace and the office politics, there is a lot to be said for them at the same time.  It's company, it's a social occasion, ok we are there to work, but there is mostly banter at some point, it's having a routine and so much more.

I realise that I am not a stay at home mum, I take my hat off to the men and women that do this job every day.  Running a business and a family is hard.  I decided that I need a routine in my day and then I can manage my family better and perhaps run the business in that order when i am in a routine.

I met a friend for coffee today after taking Toffie for an hour long walk and she agreed, when you are in a dark place, call a spade a spade in a depression, people trying to talk you out of it mean well, but you need to find a way out yourself too.  It's good that people care, but my hubby was talking to me yesterday and I couldn't connect with his positivity and help.  Then when I was in bed, thinking, I made a conscious decision about the shop.  As soon as I did it I felt a weight lift off me, off my legs, off my arms, off my face.  Off my MIND!

I'm not an expert, I'm talking about my experience which has been horrible, today is a good day and I hope tomorrow is a good day.  That's all I can go on.

Will Patchworkdelights be back?  Yes, but a different type of Patchworkdelights. 

So for now, I am going to sew when the mood takes me and make things for me and my family.  And hopefully I will reopen PD with a replenished shop soon!

 

Sunday, 28 September 2014

Sizzix


I know it's been a while since I posted, but what with a combination of health issues and time it's been a teensy bit tricky. But I thought I would kickstart things with a little sneak preview of something a couple of my friends have been asking me to make for a couple of years. I took out my Big Shot from Sizzix and got cutting.


I made my Sizzix sandwich as usual and simply put it through the Big Shot. I got my cute rectangular pieces of fabric, within seconds. I was saying to Hubby that the longest part of using the Sizzix is choosing fabrics!

Hey presto, 5 minutes of work and a group of 2" x 4" rectangles cut!


I'm afraid I cannot show you more as yet, but I promise it will be finished shortly! Fi